Infant (3) presses charges against uncle for stealing her nose

Munich (dpo) - Three-year-old Katie from Munich is not prepared to put up with this any longer – she reported her uncle Werner S., aged 48, to the police for stealing her nose completely unprovoked. The brazen thief struck in broad daylight, right in front of their relatives at a family gathering, only to proudly exclaim afterwards, “I’ve got your nose! I’ve got your nose!”
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Traffickers now placing baby animals in refugee boats to gain sympathy from Europeans

Tripoli, Libya (dpo) - Could a new turn of events breathe a new lease of life into rescue missions in the Mediterranean? Several North African traffickers have started placing baby animals in their boats in order to gain sympathy from Europeans. The plan is to have at least one cute little kitten or fluffy puppy on board each refugee boat in future.
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Study reveals indicating before turning spoils surprise for other road users

Tübingen, Germany (dpo) - For decades, learner drivers have been lectured on the absolute necessity of indicating before every turn and before overtaking. However, scientists at the Tübingen Institute for Traffic Research have now discovered a downside to using these supposedly useful light signals: indicating apparently spoils the surprise for other road users.
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Boom in property market: homeless man sells cardboard box in central Dublin for €230,000

Dublin (dpo) - Hugh O'Reilly has made his fortune – today, this homeless man from Dublin sold his cardboard box in the city centre to a businessman for €230,000. The current boom in the housing market is the reason why Mr O'Reilly was able to achieve such a good price for his abode, which measures just 1.5 m².
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Mopedwrecked! Man stranded on lonely traffic island for 20 years

Bachem, Germany (dpo) - This morning, an alert lorry driver discovered an unkempt and haggard man on a lonely traffic island near Cologne. The man was immediately transferred to hospital and only later were officials able to ascertain that this was Benno Hansen, who went missing more than 20 years ago. Apparently, aged 16, he had been the victim of a mopedwreck.
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News Ticker (10)

+++ So long: woman says goodbye to man with huge cock +++
+++ It's a match! Pyromaniac finds perfect fire starter on tinder +++
+++ Hiking: walkers greet monarch +++
+++ Fine alley: after hours searching, tourist finds lovely street +++
+++ "Donald, duck!": Trump avoids cartoon book thrown at him +++
+++ Bohemian wraps odd E: Czech Queen fan packages ornamental vowel to give as present +++
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Heroic passer-by smashes car window to save multipack of beer from dying of heat stroke

Peterborough, UK (dpo) - Saved in the nick of time! A man from Peterborough showed real courage today: he saw a multipack of beer which looked certain to die a painful death from heat stroke in a car that was parked in the direct heat of the sun. He acted swiftly to save it, smashing in the front window of the car. Now, Daniel Ruston is even due to receive an award from the City of Peterborough recognising his bravery.
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