Syria edition of classic board game Risk now available

Pawtucket (dpo) - Toy manufacturer Hasbro today presented a new version of the classic strategy board game Risk which will be commercially available from autum 2019. In Risk Syria, up to 32 players (Russia, Saudi Arabia, Turkey, USA, Germany, Iran, etc.) can engage in a proxy war on the battleground of Syria using an unending series of dice games to dispute the bombed-out city of Idlib and the handling of islamic terrorists.
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Trump proposes arming guns so they can defend themselves against being used in killing sprees

Washington, DC (dpo) - 30 people died in America’s most recent mass shootings, which took place in Texas and Ohio. Naturally, this has once more turned public attention to what politicians can do to prevent such disasters in future. Today, it was Donald Trump’s turn to present his solution: the President proposes arming all guns so they are able to defend themselves from being used by mentally ill shooters.
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NRA sends gift basket with "consolation weapons" to relatives of El Paso and Dayton shootings

El Paso / Dayton (dpo) - A truly noble gesture in difficult times: just one day after the terrible weekend in which two mass shootings left 29 people dead, the National Rifle Association (NRA) have presented the relatives of the casualties with a small gift. As a consolation for their loss, the families of each victim received a gift basket with a varied mixture of local weapon specialities.
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80% of all children are not suitable for toys according to consumer organisation

New York (dpo) - The United States based non-profit organisation Consumer Reports has tested 1,000 children – and with alarming results. The tests showed that more than 80% of children between the ages of two and ten are completely unsuitable for toys and simply break everything. For the test, 1,000 children were left alone to play in a room full of toys, such as Matchbox cars, Lego bricks, Nintendo consoles and cuddly toys.
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Automobile Association advises: always provide foil if leaving pet in parked car

Munich (dpo) - Due to the current heat wave sweeping Germany and other parts of Europe, the German Automobile Association is urging all drivers to be especially careful when parking their vehicle in the blazing sun. Dog or cat owners who leave their pets in the car should always ensure they line their seat with foil.
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Cry for help in alphabet soup: police storm Campbell’s factory

Shepperton, Australia (dpo) - A raid was carried out on the Campbell’s manufacturing facility in Shepperton after a woman from Perth alerted police to a shocking cry for help she had found in her alphabet soup. However, the large-scale operation led by the force’s Critical Incident Response Team yielded no results.
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Eighth grader kicked out of school for dividing by zero

Edmonton, Canada (dpo) - What was he thinking? His teacher warned him off several times but Max S. still went ahead and divided by zero. Now the 13-year-old has been expelled from Allendale junior high school in Edmonton, Alberta. Luckily, only his maths teacher was adversely affected. She is now receiving psychological support.
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