Hospital moves to perform all surgical procedures at night in a bid to save anaesthetics

Berlin (dpo) - Could this concept catch on? The Pantaleon Clinic in Berlin recently became the first hospital in Germany to announce that surgery will now only be performed between the hours of 10 p.m. and 5 a.m. Since patients are usually asleep during these hours, there is no need for general anaesthetics, which are costly sedatives.
Read more »

Providing a more natural habitat: pet shop offers microplastics for fish tanks

Aurora, Illinois (dpo) - Pet fish can now finally live like they do in their natural habitat! A pet shop in Aurora, Illinois, today launched a new product: microplastics for fish tanks. This product can be used to create an absolutely realistic habitat for underwater companions.
Read more »

Pensioner loses control over wheeled walker and careens into crowd of people

Portland, OR (dpo) - This morning, a 77 year-old man lost control over his wheeled walking frame and careered straight into a crowd of people in a pedestrian area of Portland, Oregon. The man in question, Norman S., admits fault, saying that he had tried to reduce the speed of his vehicle. However, instead of successfully braking, he ended up travelling even faster. Luckily, no one was seriously injured but the controversy about the safety of wheeled walking frames is once again in the public eye.
Read more »

Microsoft introduces five bins to sort files for recycling

Redmond (dpo) - Windows is finally going green: there is now an update available for Microsoft’s Windows 10 which will introduce waste separation to domestic computers for the first time. Environmentalists have long criticised the fact that all computer files are disposed of in the same recycle bin regardless of format.
Read more »

Police finally catch man who always screws the lids on too tightly

Eisenach, Germany (dpo) - After years of investigation, one of the greatest criminological riddles of the post-war era has apparently been solved. Today, officers of the Federal Criminal Police Office arrested a 65-year-old man in Eisenach who is suspected of screwing the lids of glass jars containing food so tightly that unsuspecting customers could barely open them, and of having done so since 1978.
Read more »

Old habits die hard: Generals deliver Biden’s first security briefing using hand puppets

Washington (dpo) – Freshly inaugurated US President Joe Biden got a shock on his first day at work in the White House. His Generals delivered the security briefing using boldly coloured graphics and hand puppets. Evidently they were accustomed to taking this approach with President Biden’s predecessor.
Read more »

Woman ties bell to spider to stop it creeping up and scaring her

Waterloo, Ontario (dpo) - An arachnophobic student from Ontario has discovered an ingenius way to prevent the spider in her flat from creeping up on her – she has tied a small bell to the animal’s leg so she is forewarned when it is on the move and can quickly retreat to safety.
Read more »