Following Jerusalem decision, Trump has fuel poured on Californian forest fires

Washington (dpo) - Shortly after his decision to move the US Embassy in Israel to Jerusalem, President of the USA, Donald Trump, announced his next major move. This one concerns the handling of the devastating forest fires which are currently raging through the state of California and forcing tens of thousands of people to flee. President Trump intends to have the flames doused with fuel.
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Brilliant driver clears several miles of traffic jam by sounding horn

London, UK (dpo) - This morning, a Londoner cleared a traffic jam of approximately 20 miles (32 km) in a matter of seconds with his gallant intervention. While other drivers queued helplessly, Andrew Richardson (28) loudly beeped his horn once and gesticulated wildly, which immediately cleared the traffic jam.
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USA: black man survives stop-and-search-operation unwounded

Greensboro (dpo) – In the US, there has been a sensational incident again between a Police Officer and an Afro-American citizen. In a stop-and-search operation in Greensboro, North Carolina, 29-year-old Dwayne Harris was apparently neither killed nor brutally beaten up. The American public are puzzled about the Officer’s motives, who idly allowed several opportunities for use of violence to lapse.
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Loch Ness monster hatches young

Loch Ness (dpo) - Scotland now has even more to see – another four attractions, to be precise. Blurred black and white photographs show that the world-famous Loch Ness monster has finally become a mother. Nessie fans from all over the world are now enthusiastically flocking from near and far to admire this natural wonder.
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Sight of young female pharmacist causes man with penile yeast infection to spontaneously purchase cough syrup

Augsburg (dpo) - Confronted with a young female pharmacist, a 25-year-old man with a very itchy penile yeast infection spontaneously bought a bottle of cough syrup instead of a soothing cream in central Augsburg today. By his own account, he had already tried in vain to procure a treatment for his ailment at several different pharmacies.
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Box from 1935 finally opened: Schrödinger's cat is definitely dead

Vienna (dpo) - A chance finding has finally provided the answer to a question we have been asking for nearly a century: is the cat dead or alive? The cat in question being the famous ‘Schrödinger’s cat’ who gained that name for taking part in an experiment of the same name. The animal was locked inside a box with a vial of poison for the experiment and the question could only be answered by opening the box. Archivists at the University of Vienna have now found the box and have therefore been able to answer the question: the cat is unmistakably dead.
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Huge celebrations as champagne factory christened with cruise ship

Epernay (dpo) - Yesterday, tens of thousands of visitors attended a factory opening that appealed to the audience in quite a special way. The champagne manufacturer invited visitors and VIPs to the grand inauguration. The highlight of the ceremony was the cruise ship, which is traditionally thrown against the walls of the factory.
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